It's been a week since my family and friends said our farewell(s) to my son, Nate Mansfield, at the Morris Hills Cemetary in Boise Idaho. We visited it again today and saw the flowers we placed on his casket - set aside and still damp due to some recent rains. Took some seeds, will plant those at home.
Time has travelled oddly since the funeral. Stretch has been met with opposing speed. I've refrained from any deep postings, just 'cause I've been pooped - "time warped", in a sense.
But I have been reading some great posts from others that are out there.
One blog in particular that I frequently read is Chad Estes' musings. He's a close friend and someone I enjoy being with in life.
He's got a great piece on taking a survey for the Shack...a book that has been on the NY Times Best Sellers list for 43 weeks.
If you haven't read the book, it's a little like Neo meeting the Oracle, mixed in with Bruce Marchiano's version of Jesus in the "Matthew Video"....for those who have ears to hear, let them hear.
He's also got a great piece on death and taxes -in which he mentions Nate's passing.
Visit both. Start with the link and then move forward in time...after all, it's up to you, Neo.
Den
Den, went to Chad's "Death & Taxes". Very easy to relive that day through his writing. Very gifted writer. That afternoon Had a very surreal feeling to it. I've never watched a casket go into it's vault. Very final, but somehow kind of glorious as we sang until that racketing sound stopped and we finished the last bit of "Jesus loves Me". The love and God's spirit was so thick right at that moment that it gave me a peace that you, Sue, the Family and all of us were going to be OK. Never quite whole again but a new place to put the Holy Spirit. For me a very needed and excellent adventure....dude....LOve you guys
Henri
Posted by: Henri Raynaud | March 28, 2009 at 12:22 AM
Den, have you seen the critisism on "The Shack" that was forwarded to me from the Treasure Valley News. Scathing in it's remarks. Sorry don't have the link, but i'll see if I can forward it to your email. I still love the book, but it's sad to me to see the attacks within the body against it's own members,
Jon
Posted by: Jon Ravenholt | March 28, 2009 at 12:18 PM
Thanks, Henri. I agree. It was so "real" that it was un-real. All the years that you wrestled with my beloved first son, who was also your friend...all the photos you captured of him...all the hugs and kisses that he had for Janine as a toddler. All real. All gone.
Yet, Nate is alive with Christ and even more real than we are today...hence the Matrix metaphor and the use of The Shack, as reference points in the posting.
Sue, Colin and I stopped by Nate's grave yesterday. A week later the flowers were still on top of the turf (the cut sod), so I took some seeds from those beautiful flowers. Will replant them in my back yard.
This next Wednesday it will be three weeks since he died. Soon it will be 3 months, then 3 years. Our grief is sincere but not hopeless, as those who do not know Christ as Savior.
It is still grief, nonetheless. And deeply painful.
I watched some VHS videos today of Nate from our San Bernardino days and also from when we first moved to Boise. What a fun kid he was. What great friends you were to us back then. Thanks for then...and thanks for now.
Den
Posted by: Dennis Mansfield | March 28, 2009 at 05:21 PM
I have been greatly moved by your words and thoughts on your son.
I recently lost a friend's daughter and wrote about it on my blog. You are welcome to read it.
http://jeaniespokane.blogspot.com/2009/03/live-like-theres-no-tomorrow.html
Posted by: Jeanie Buchanan | March 29, 2009 at 12:10 PM
Thank you Jeanie. Your piece is a wonderful posting. I encourage blog readers to visit your site and read it.
Den
Posted by: Dennis | March 29, 2009 at 10:13 PM